And you thought it was nearly impossible to beat Mike Tyson.

(Thanks to the reader who sent us this one.)

In anticipation of Brett Favre’s return, the Packers open their new indoor practice facility.

The Steelers hire a new personal trainer for Casey Hampton.

“If you don’t release me by Monday at noon, the cheese gets it.”

Brett Favre is ready for the Big Apple.

Swimmin’ pools . . . .  Movie stars.

Brett Favre continues to follow the patent-pending T.O. career plan.

For his next interview, Brett Favre decides to face a more challenging and knowledgeable group of questioners.

The Packers agree to bring Favre back, if he agrees to wear this hat to every press conference of the season.

Maybe this whole unretirement three-ring circus is aimed at generating buzz for Brett’s new restaurant.

The Packers suggest a cure for Brett Favre’s “itch”.

In an effort to improve his image, Brandon Marshall does a public service billboard.

Michael Strahan’s acting pursuits will include starring in a live-action Shrek sequel.

Cedric Benson rolls out his breathalyzer equipped boat-car.

Amazingly, surveillance video from Javon Walker’s hotel confirms his version of the events leading to his robbery.  Sort of.

The Raiders make a minor adjustment to their logo.

The Bills have a new drill to help Marshawn Lynch get ready for his next hit-and-run.

The Tuna finally finds a kicker who knows how to keep his mouth shut.

Peter Graves wants to know if we’ve ever seen a grown man naked.

T.O. goes on a shopping spree with his new money.  Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Ray Edwards suddenly re-thinks his desire to become the next “Sack King.”

Jason Taylor’s acting debut isn’t quite what he had envisioned.

Brian Urlacher decides that if he’s going  to act like Chad Johnson, he might as well look like Chad Johnson.

For Mother’s Day, Cedric Benson thinks you should take your mom out to the lake for some booze and some pepper spray.

The bad news is he got pepper sprayed; the good news is that Cedric Benson landed a new endorsement.

“Blue Moon Racing” buys its first truck from a Mr. Cheech and a Mr. Chong.

Marvin Lewis has a new plan for rehabilitating draft picks with troubled pasts.

Jaren Allen is confused by the jersey that he was issued in Minnesota.

Pats coach Bill Belichick applies the Vulcan mind trick to a surprisingly svelte Eric Magini.

The NFL’s dumpster has been loaned to NFLN.

The story of the draft stock of Adarius Bowman, Aqib Talib, and Mario Manningham will be presented in a new documentary. 

Arthur Blank was a little off in his description of Mike Vick’s prison activities.